JOKES

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Mar 14, 2008 22:41:07 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Mar 14, 2008 22:41:07 GMT (I'm pretty sure you can get special treatment for afflictions like this)
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Mar 14, 2008 23:50:59 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Mar 14, 2008 23:50:59 GMT I thought about getting a corduroy pillow but I didn't want anyone to know, I couldn't be bothered with it making the headlines.
	"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Mar 15, 2008 10:59:32 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Mar 15, 2008 10:59:32 GMT Now, seriously, you're putting me in a difficult position.
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Mar 15, 2008 13:45:49 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Mar 15, 2008 13:45:49 GMT Why do cowboys ride horses? Cos they're too heavy to carry. _________________________ Onions + baked beans = tear gas. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
	"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Mar 17, 2008 2:02:34 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Mar 17, 2008 2:02:34 GMT Did you hear about the cannibal who dumped his girlfriend? (Think about it... ;D)
	"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Darkness
'Has no life'

Posts: 7,904

JOKES Mar 20, 2008 22:56:37 GMT

Quote

Post by Darkness on Mar 20, 2008 22:56:37 GMT

*****SICK JOKES FROM A TWISTED MIND*****

Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Right where you left it.

What has two legs and bleeds profusely?

Half a dog.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?

One, but you have to throw it really hard.

What's worse than ten dead babies in a barrel?

One dead baby in ten barrels.

"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath).
"In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Mar 21, 2008 16:15:32 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Mar 21, 2008 16:15:32 GMT Dogs and babies? Ah, your maternal instinct is showing through. ;D
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Mar 21, 2008 16:16:04 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Mar 21, 2008 16:16:04 GMT darkness said: Did you hear about the cannibal who dumped his girlfriend? (Think about it... ;D) Gross. ;D exalts (then bans ...)
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Darkness
'Has no life'

Posts: 7,904

JOKES Mar 21, 2008 17:52:33 GMT

Quote

Post by Darkness on Mar 21, 2008 17:52:33 GMT

I'm talking about bleeding dogs which have been cut in half, and dismembered baby corpses, and you think this shows my maternal instinct...??!!

Oh dear.

I'm not sure if I should be more worried about myself or about you... It's all SICK and WRONG, I tell you.

"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath).
"In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Mar 21, 2008 20:18:59 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Mar 21, 2008 20:18:59 GMT That's my girl. ;D
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Mar 23, 2008 1:04:48 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Mar 23, 2008 1:04:48 GMT
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Darkness
'Has no life'

Posts: 7,904

JOKES Mar 25, 2008 23:17:06 GMT

Quote

Post by Darkness on Mar 25, 2008 23:17:06 GMT

Police Station toilet stolen....Cops have nothing to go on.

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

If a thing is worth doing, it would have been done already.

Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die

Don't get married. Find a woman you hate and buy her a house. It's a lot easier.

Be proud of how modest you are.

Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.

For sale: parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac.

All generalizations are false, including this one.

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous.

On the other hand, you have different fingers.

Clones are people two.

I couldn't care less about apathy.

;D

"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath).
"In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Mar 26, 2008 0:59:14 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Mar 26, 2008 0:59:14 GMT ;D You've just given me an idea. I think I'm going to start a board of inappropriate mottos at work, starting with the one about about apathy! I think my dad would like the AI one. You're banned.
	Last Edit: Mar 26, 2008 0:59:38 GMT by Goblin King About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Apr 4, 2008 23:15:42 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Apr 4, 2008 23:15:42 GMT What's Mary short for? She's got no legs.
	"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Darkness
'Has no life'

Posts: 7,904

JOKES Apr 4, 2008 23:16:50 GMT

Quote

Post by Darkness on Apr 4, 2008 23:16:50 GMT

A man went to a psychiatrist. He said, "I keep having these alternating recurring dreams. First I'm a teepee, then I'm a wigwam, then I'm a teepee, and then I'm a wigwam. It's driving me crazy. What's wrong with me?"

The doctor replied, "It's very simple. You're two tents."

"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath).
"In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Apr 4, 2008 23:19:04 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Apr 4, 2008 23:19:04 GMT What's blue and smells like paint? Blue paint.
	Last Edit: Apr 4, 2008 23:19:22 GMT by Darkness "Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Apr 5, 2008 21:37:26 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Apr 5, 2008 21:37:26 GMT heavy heavy sigh ( ;D )
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Apr 6, 2008 11:36:35 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:36:35 GMT Two fish in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
	"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Apr 6, 2008 11:37:10 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:37:10 GMT What type of printers do pigs use? Oinkjet.
	"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Apr 6, 2008 11:47:49 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:47:49 GMT Who has 8 pistols ands terrorises the seas? Billy the squid.
	"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Apr 6, 2008 11:48:36 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:48:36 GMT What's red and sits in the corner? A naughty tomato.
	"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Darkness 'Has no life' Posts: 7,904	JOKES Apr 6, 2008 11:49:24 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:49:24 GMT What should you do with a green monster? Wait til it's ripe.
	"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath). "In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Apr 6, 2008 14:18:20 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Apr 6, 2008 14:18:20 GMT darkness said: What type of printers do pigs use? Oinkjet. ;D Exalts!
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Apr 13, 2008 19:53:25 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Apr 13, 2008 19:53:25 GMT
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

lollipop 'Has no life' Resident Retro Gamer Geek Posts: 4,673	JOKES Apr 15, 2008 13:43:27 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by lollipop on Apr 15, 2008 13:43:27 GMT If at first you don't succeed, redefine success. Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. What's blue and smells like paint? Blue paint. ;D

lollipop 'Has no life' Resident Retro Gamer Geek Posts: 4,673	JOKES Apr 15, 2008 13:44:01 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by lollipop on Apr 15, 2008 13:44:01 GMT Apr 13, 2008 19:53:25 GMT Goblin King said: Omfg that's genius!!

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Apr 16, 2008 21:01:22 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Apr 16, 2008 21:01:22 GMT Apr 15, 2008 13:43:27 GMT lollipop said: Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. That, I like! What's blue and smells like paint? Blue paint. [/i] ;D[/quote] That's just SILLY ! (exalts)
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

Goblin King Administrator Still waving gnarly claws. Posts: 31,702	JOKES Apr 17, 2008 13:54:17 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Goblin King on Apr 17, 2008 13:54:17 GMT (Oops, Lollipop was actually quoting Darkness ...)
	About.me page I am goblin. Hear me ROAR!

lolli Guest	JOKES Apr 18, 2008 19:47:24 GMT Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Post by lolli on Apr 18, 2008 19:47:24 GMT Haha but I got an exalt for my troubles ;D

Darkness
'Has no life'

Posts: 7,904

JOKES Apr 24, 2008 15:19:34 GMT

Quote

Post by Darkness on Apr 24, 2008 15:19:34 GMT

Heard this the other day and quite liked it -

A bloke goes into a pub with his pet newt and says to the barman, "Have you seen my pet newt? He's called Tiny." The barman asks "Why do you call him Tiny?", and the bloke says "Because he's my newt". (Minute - geddit??!!) ;D

"Dying is an art, like everything else. I do it exceptionally well." (Sylvia Plath).
"In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer". (Albert Camus).

Post by Goblin King on Mar 14, 2008 22:41:07 GMT

Post by Darkness on Mar 14, 2008 23:50:59 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Mar 15, 2008 10:59:32 GMT

Post by Darkness on Mar 15, 2008 13:45:49 GMT

Post by Darkness on Mar 17, 2008 2:02:34 GMT

Post by Darkness on Mar 20, 2008 22:56:37 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Mar 21, 2008 16:15:32 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Mar 21, 2008 16:16:04 GMT

Post by Darkness on Mar 21, 2008 17:52:33 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Mar 21, 2008 20:18:59 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Mar 23, 2008 1:04:48 GMT

Post by Darkness on Mar 25, 2008 23:17:06 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Mar 26, 2008 0:59:14 GMT

Post by Darkness on Apr 4, 2008 23:15:42 GMT

Post by Darkness on Apr 4, 2008 23:16:50 GMT

Post by Darkness on Apr 4, 2008 23:19:04 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Apr 5, 2008 21:37:26 GMT

Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:36:35 GMT

Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:37:10 GMT

Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:47:49 GMT

Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:48:36 GMT

Post by Darkness on Apr 6, 2008 11:49:24 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Apr 6, 2008 14:18:20 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Apr 13, 2008 19:53:25 GMT

Post by lollipop on Apr 15, 2008 13:43:27 GMT

Post by lollipop on Apr 15, 2008 13:44:01 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Apr 16, 2008 21:01:22 GMT

Post by Goblin King on Apr 17, 2008 13:54:17 GMT

Post by lolli on Apr 18, 2008 19:47:24 GMT

Post by Darkness on Apr 24, 2008 15:19:34 GMT

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